Teddie the turtle was a young hearted turtle. He lived the a underwater city similar to Atlantis located at the southern tip of Iraq, bordering the Indian ocean. His close friend Jonsey Van-Persie as army rangers pyromaniac that lived in an American Military base close by. One day something tragic that should never be spoke of happened while teddie the turtle was in his favorite restaurant. Optimus the octopus stole Teddie's teddy bear, and the world turned upside down. He called up his spec ops friend and had him hunt down Optimus and told him to blow Optimus out of the water, but my real concern is soldiers over seas.
"One day something tragic that should never be spoke of happened" As a reader, I am thinking, "by all means, speak of it!" What is so important about the teddy bear that its abduction caused such a disaster? That is a good way to draw in a reader. On that note, you might consider ending it at "the world turned upside down." Remember that a hook is just the introduction (the exposition of our "Plot Pyramid"). The next sentence leaves your exposition and starts into your rising action.
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